HEROES - Several years ago I had the great opportunity to hear Maya Angelou speak. What an amazing woman. I have respected and admired her for years. In her speech she said that it is very sad that most people could not look to their own families and find heroes. At that moment I wished I had been sitting in the front row so I could raise my hand and tell her that my heroes are my family. I had always taken it for granted but her speech made me realize that I was very lucky.
My maternal-grandpa died when I was 9 but I remember him vividly. He was a kind and gentle man who loved his family more then anything in the world. I remember fighting with my siblings and cousins to sit on his lap. Somehow he made room for all of us.
My maternal-grandma died when I was 17. She too was kind and gentle. When I was a young girl I told her that I wished we were a rich and famous family. Her response would stay with me to this day, "when you have your health you are 'rich' ". She came to America at the age of 16 and couldn't speak english. She decided to go to school to learn the language. It was very important to her. She found classes difficult and hard to follow so she quit. She started listening to the radio everyday and that is how she learned the language. She spoke beautifully.
My paternal-grandma died when I was 35. She knew her time was nearing when I was pregnant with Joe and she would beg me to hurry and have the baby. She wanted to see him so badly. The day he was born she had a massive stroke and lived til he was 9 months old. Although she could not speak her hands were strong and she loved holding him. She felt previleged to be in this country and never looked back. She made me proud to be here too.
My paternal-grandpa was another story which I won't get into but it made my Dad the man he is today.
My Dad is a proud man. He served his country during World War II. He is a kind and generous man who is loved by all who know him. I learned my patriotism from him. A strong Democrat who believed you MUST respect the man who sits in the Oval office. Of course, recently he has felt differently and so he says nothing. If you have nothing good to say then you say nothing. My Dad owned his own business and worked 7 days a week. His store hours were 7:00 a.m. to 11:00 p.m. and my Dad was there most of the time. Although he was rarely home I don't remember lacking for his attention. He believed in providing for his family first. I also remember that he never complained because he felt this is what he should do, what he was suppose to do. His children were ALWAYS number one. No, he wasn't perfect but he did the best he knew how and as far as I am concerned he did a damn good job. He told me when I was a teenager, "You must learn to provide for yourself as an adult. Don't EVER depend on a man to take care of you". I never have. He never use to say "I love you" easily or how proud he was of his kids but somehow you always knew. A few years ago when Joe and I were left on our own I took the bull by the horns. My Dad called me one day and said "I just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you and how much I love you". I told him I was able to do it because of what I learned from him.
My Mom was considered the most beautiful woman in Stockton in her day. To me she always was. I was a mama's girl. Something that drove her crazy when I was young but something she grew to love later. She, too, put her children first and foremost. I learned another lesson from my mom that has helped me over the years. She said "Life is not easy. Being married is especially difficult. There are obstacles along the way but if you force yourself to get over them it is so much better on the other side". I have gotten through difficult times in my life because I was never surprised by the difficult times. I accepted them and forged ahead. (For the record, we are still allowed to get angry over moments in our life and lash out but that doesn't mean we haven't forged ahead. How sad that I am constantly having to add that disclaimer).
Last July I was in a severe car accident that left me with a broken sternum. I couldn't move without help so I was taken to my parents home to have them care for me. As I watched my Mom, who is crippled with rheumatoid arthritis, care for me I cried. When she asked me what was the matter, I said "I should be taking care of you". She said "I would rather be caring for you then burying you". She brought me back into reality.
To my parents, being Lebanese Catholics was extremely important. We grew up being proud of our heritage but lucky to be living in the United States. My Dad always wanted us to remember who our ancestors were and where they came from so we could feel proud to be where we are.
As of now my folks are in their 80s. My Mom is in the hospital and very ill. I hope we can bring her home next week but time will tell. As I watch this very fragile woman fight for her life and my father at her side scared to death of losing her I think of the wonderful life they have given me. They have been married nearly 61 years and are "glued at the hip". They have loved each other and their children unconditionally. I am so very lucky to call these two people "Mom" and "Dad". They out lived their oldest child and managed to get up everyday and breathe in and out and take care of the rest of their family. It is because of them that even though I could not give my son the life that I had he will still have a priviledged life because of what they gave to me and I was able to pass onto him.
These people are my heroes and how lucky I am to call them my family
My maternal-grandpa died when I was 9 but I remember him vividly. He was a kind and gentle man who loved his family more then anything in the world. I remember fighting with my siblings and cousins to sit on his lap. Somehow he made room for all of us.
My maternal-grandma died when I was 17. She too was kind and gentle. When I was a young girl I told her that I wished we were a rich and famous family. Her response would stay with me to this day, "when you have your health you are 'rich' ". She came to America at the age of 16 and couldn't speak english. She decided to go to school to learn the language. It was very important to her. She found classes difficult and hard to follow so she quit. She started listening to the radio everyday and that is how she learned the language. She spoke beautifully.
My paternal-grandma died when I was 35. She knew her time was nearing when I was pregnant with Joe and she would beg me to hurry and have the baby. She wanted to see him so badly. The day he was born she had a massive stroke and lived til he was 9 months old. Although she could not speak her hands were strong and she loved holding him. She felt previleged to be in this country and never looked back. She made me proud to be here too.
My paternal-grandpa was another story which I won't get into but it made my Dad the man he is today.
My Dad is a proud man. He served his country during World War II. He is a kind and generous man who is loved by all who know him. I learned my patriotism from him. A strong Democrat who believed you MUST respect the man who sits in the Oval office. Of course, recently he has felt differently and so he says nothing. If you have nothing good to say then you say nothing. My Dad owned his own business and worked 7 days a week. His store hours were 7:00 a.m. to 11:00 p.m. and my Dad was there most of the time. Although he was rarely home I don't remember lacking for his attention. He believed in providing for his family first. I also remember that he never complained because he felt this is what he should do, what he was suppose to do. His children were ALWAYS number one. No, he wasn't perfect but he did the best he knew how and as far as I am concerned he did a damn good job. He told me when I was a teenager, "You must learn to provide for yourself as an adult. Don't EVER depend on a man to take care of you". I never have. He never use to say "I love you" easily or how proud he was of his kids but somehow you always knew. A few years ago when Joe and I were left on our own I took the bull by the horns. My Dad called me one day and said "I just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you and how much I love you". I told him I was able to do it because of what I learned from him.
My Mom was considered the most beautiful woman in Stockton in her day. To me she always was. I was a mama's girl. Something that drove her crazy when I was young but something she grew to love later. She, too, put her children first and foremost. I learned another lesson from my mom that has helped me over the years. She said "Life is not easy. Being married is especially difficult. There are obstacles along the way but if you force yourself to get over them it is so much better on the other side". I have gotten through difficult times in my life because I was never surprised by the difficult times. I accepted them and forged ahead. (For the record, we are still allowed to get angry over moments in our life and lash out but that doesn't mean we haven't forged ahead. How sad that I am constantly having to add that disclaimer).
Last July I was in a severe car accident that left me with a broken sternum. I couldn't move without help so I was taken to my parents home to have them care for me. As I watched my Mom, who is crippled with rheumatoid arthritis, care for me I cried. When she asked me what was the matter, I said "I should be taking care of you". She said "I would rather be caring for you then burying you". She brought me back into reality.
To my parents, being Lebanese Catholics was extremely important. We grew up being proud of our heritage but lucky to be living in the United States. My Dad always wanted us to remember who our ancestors were and where they came from so we could feel proud to be where we are.
As of now my folks are in their 80s. My Mom is in the hospital and very ill. I hope we can bring her home next week but time will tell. As I watch this very fragile woman fight for her life and my father at her side scared to death of losing her I think of the wonderful life they have given me. They have been married nearly 61 years and are "glued at the hip". They have loved each other and their children unconditionally. I am so very lucky to call these two people "Mom" and "Dad". They out lived their oldest child and managed to get up everyday and breathe in and out and take care of the rest of their family. It is because of them that even though I could not give my son the life that I had he will still have a priviledged life because of what they gave to me and I was able to pass onto him.
These people are my heroes and how lucky I am to call them my family
posted by Jea9 | 4:45 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home