My Little Bundle of Joey

Today I was going to write about "growing pains" because it was exactly 5 years ago this week that mine and Joe's lives changed completely but today when I got home from work my son, Joe, showed me his report card. My once honor student has been struggling since 7th grade. We have been dealing with this issue for some time. I have tried grounding him, taking away privileges, etc. Nothing has worked. I told him that as much as I hated to do this I would need to talk to his dad about Joe going to live with him. He asked me what good that would do for him. I told him it would do nothing for him but that I was exhausted and needed the break. My son cried. Then he explained how much he hated his father for what he did to our lives. He hated his father for putting himself first instead of his own son. He hated his father for running away every time the going got tough. He said "I never blamed you, Mom, for what happened". I always knew that but it helped to hear it from him. I did tell him there were times I wanted to run away because I felt emotionally drained but he said "running away did nothing for Dad and so therefore that shouldn't be a solution". I told him had he ever told his Dad how he felt and he said no because his Dad is coward and it would change nothing.

I love this child with every ounce of my being. He COMPLETES ME. I realized I would only be hurting myself and what security Joe had by sending him away. We never did come up with a solution to his homework situation but I will stand my this child til death due us part. He doesn't deserve any more heartache and I will fight to the death for this young man.

Today, when I woke, I felt scared. Finances aren't good and I have no idea how we will get through this school year but knowing that this very special person loves me with all his heart and is willing to do whatever it takes to make life easier for us is the greatest reward.

I love you, Joe. You are the best, the B-E-S-T, BEST!

MOM